I am one very small person, after all.
For what it's worth: it's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.
I haven’t had Internet the past week, it makes me think a lot about what life would be like without any technology. How different would it be to live in some cabin in the woods, or at my families farm, no technology and all alone.
I figure I would go mad after a week. But why would I? Would it be so different than living in a city like I do now? In the heart of Minneapolis I see and meet people daily, but there is no depth to any of those interactions, no connection. Store clerks, fellow students, random people on the sidewalk. A complete moment to imagine life all alone living anywhere. What would I do each day? I’d probably read a lot. How would I decide when I should go to sleep and when I should wake up, if I was truly out there alone, corresponding with no one. Would I bother to keep track of the days of the week or month? Would I look back upon time spent that way as wasted or as something that was worth experiencing?
Regardless of all that, I suppose each way has it’s own type of loneliness. There’s city loneliness and country loneliness. It’s probably best to never get too used to either one.